Every time I hear a news about a fallen Lupus Fighter, I feel a little bit nervous. For example, last December 2018, three of my fellow known Lupus Fighters in Eastern Visayas (Philippines) were fallen. And just this February 2019, another fighter, (Ma'am Kate Camagting) surrendered. I know them because they are members of the Eastern Visayas Lupus Warrior Group organized by a patient of one of the Rheumatologist in Tacloban City. And I believe, that there are others who are defeated by Lupus day by day.
Fighters' defeat simply tells us that Lupus really kills. And not only this Lupus can kill us but the drugs used to control Lupus can cause death too to us in a way that it will lower down our defense system against infection.
We have no choice but to face the fact that if we want to win against Lupus, we need to use the weapons that can kill us too. In other words, we, the Lupus Fighters, are engaged in a battle against Lupus using our weapons that can kill both Lupus and us (the fighters). As we attack Lupus, we are actually attacking our own too. So, in the end, we will be killed either by Lupus itself or by the weapons we used to attack Lupus.
That's how ironic it is to be a Lupus Fighter. That's why I am getting ready for the worst. And I hope I will be one of the lucky fighters who will be successful in suppressing Lupus without losing our own life.
Draining Resources
Just like what I already had told you, I am engaged on this fight against Lupus since 2016. The fight is not easy for us because we don't have the money for the medicines. You see, our income is only enough for our daily needs. So, in order to get hold of the medicines that I need, I am forced to have a series of loans from a bank, until I am no longer allowed to get another loan account.
When the Lupus flared up on July 2018, we were at the point of nowhere to run for, except to beg people to support us for this fight. And I am very much thankful, first to God, for giving you a generous heart and letting you feel pity (mercy) on me. And with your help and support, I am able to survive at least for seven months now. Thank you so much.
But as time goes by, my resources in fighting Lupus are fast draining too. I only have few armaments now and by a week or two, I will have no weapons at all.
But NO..... I am wrong!
I still have one very powerful weapon and more ammunition for the weapon too. That "weapon" is my faith to God, and these "ammunition" are your love and support to me.
This is the reason why in my past article (Lupus and the Cure), I was talking about religion. And If you are one of my friends at Facebook, you would have noticed already that I am always posting updates related to my religion.
I just couldn't separate my fight against Lupus from religion because I am actually getting strength from the words of God taught to us during the worship services we have on Thursdays and Sundays. And I am such lucky to be part of the flock of Christ in these last days in the Far East (Iglesia Ni Cristo), because every time we congregate to worship God, I always receive the words of God in the form of lessons taught to us by our Church Administration that suits my situation.
God is My Lone Hope
Lupus, just like what the doctors said, has no cure. It can be controlled but it has no cure. It means that if you have money, you can buy the needed medicines to control the illness. So, while being suppressed, Lupus is always there waiting for the right time to flare up, but at least with the right medicine, it is being controlled.
But in my case now, I think, it's different. As of the moment, I don't have the amount to purchase the medicines. The ones sponsored by the Hinunangan District Public Schools Employees Association (HDPSEA... Thank you very much) are almost gone. Without the right medicines to control this illness, Lupus will become an illness that has no cure and CAN'T be controlled.
Those fallen Lupus Fighters I mentioned above, before they tasted the defeat, they came first to the point of having a Lupus with no cure and can't be controlled, just because their resources were already drained.
So now, It's like I am already at a dead-end and nowhere to go, and I will just wait for the time to be defeated by Lupus.... But, that is, if I have no faith to our God.
At least, now I still have a firm faith to our God Almighty... the only true God.... the Father of Christ our Lord.
I think, this is the will of God that I will come to a point that I have nothing to control the illness, so that I will hold firmly to my faith to Him. And on the right time, you will see, how God will heal me.
So, I will just hold firmly to my faith, and be healed. To God be the Glory!
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